brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
