found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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