he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
