just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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