No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
