just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize