I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
