I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
