I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
