well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
