1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
