thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Randomize
