When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
