so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Help. Why am I so naked?
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