There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
