I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize