Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
So apparently I’m into choking now
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
