Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
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