I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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