i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
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