Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
