fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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