haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
