You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
ok first of all what the fuck
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize