i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
