Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
