I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
tell your sister to shave her snatch
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
