Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
He? As in you personified your dick?
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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