I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
The best revenge is premature balding
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
