P.S. I can't hear my feet
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
he was CRYING into my vagina
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
