I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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