if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
