you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
