So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
