Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
