my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
