wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
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I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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