69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Randomize
