Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize