Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
