Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
this boner is exhausting
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize