Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
