How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
