I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
