spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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