that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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