Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Terrible idea I love it
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
