it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
