**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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