All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Randomize
