so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
